I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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