You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
