I'm drive I can fine osifer
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
