I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
