She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
