the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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