I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize