she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
