just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Randomize
