Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
