Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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