i wish my penis had a tongue
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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