i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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