somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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