he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
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