so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
