You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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