..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize