so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize