now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Randomize
