his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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