I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
