Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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