i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Just high enough for therapy.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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