His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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