Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
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