Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
