hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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