I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize