Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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