oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Randomize
