just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
