i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
