i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
