Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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