Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
What a dumb baby whore.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize