Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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