Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize