Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We talked him into tasing himself.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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