we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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