I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
