Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
