after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
