she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Randomize
