eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
