names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Panties = found
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