Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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