So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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