I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
