This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
