it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
