Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
