Swine flu. Run for my life!
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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